You seek judgment,

you seek evidence,

you bring destruction to the destroyer,

you wanna hurt me,

you wanna break it,

when deep down inside you wanna be me,

I’m the cause of your affliction,

I’m the holder of your submission,

you come at me,

you better damn well bring your best game,

because I’m not old,

for just no reason,

I’m old because I’m the survivor.

Make me, she said,

make me feel again and it will all be yours.

I didn’t know what this all was,

but it didn’t stop me from trying.

I started slowly,

with a touch,

a caress.

She didn’t even fake interest,

next I kissed her softly,

she showed no signs of temptation,

then I pulled the knife from the table and placed it against her skin.

She looked at me,

there was no fear in her eyes,

she didn’t scream,

she did nothing,

even as I slowly skinned her of her flesh,

she just looked at me as though I wasn’t even there,

and as she bleed to death quietly in front of me I wondered,

what was this all,

and did it really matter?

Blades of glass,

piercing skin,

tearing open,

the blood within,

escaping,

flowing,

draining from its source,

which pumps repeatedly,

without remorse,

this perfect machine,

 this body of mine,

killing me slowly,

its only a matter of time.

Whisperings,

words written in blood,

broken,

spirits above,

decaying,

rotting pieces of flesh,

endings,

beginning their dance,

slowly building,

towards its crescendo,

can you feel it?

As it thrusts harder against the wall,

trying to break through,

trying to kill,

us all.

A silent moment,

bathed in darkness,

starving my senses,

draining me,

killing me,

bury me deep,

encase me in dirt,

making into nothing,

let me be free.

Wishful thinking,

dreams floating through the air,

flying through the skies,

no prayers,

no cares,

but dreams end,

or become nightmares,

what is this?

A nightmare?

A dream?

Or just my reality?

my reality of me.

Subjected to your lies,

blinded by my eyes,

disenchanted,

no wishes granted,

filled with hate,

I wanna eradicate,

everything you stand for,

everything my eyes saw,

I’ll break you down,

I’ll remove your crown,

I’ll bury you deep,

in the forever sleep.

Star crossed at birth,

never meant to be,

never meant to see,

joining as one,

towards an ending,

an impossibility,

born from a beginning,

that should’ve never been,

perfection,

how can it be fought,

destinies wicked tentacles,

wrap around us,

as we share one last kiss,

before we end it all.

Seething,

writing,

agony,

broken,

is this who I am?

Is this me?

Is this my life? 

Where have I been?

What have I become?

did I fall so far,

did I sink so low,

that I forgot,

I lost,

who I was,

and became,

who I am,

someone I don’t know…