Realization that the world you inhabited, the world you lived and breathed for more time than you did your own, is not only gone, but, existing without your input. It’s not like there was any false realities, it wasn’t like you didn’t know that fact was already true, you’d left the world before, it continued on, then somehow, you returned. This time, this final time, you know you’ll never go back, this time you know your existence in this world is truly over. So, coming to all these conclusions, coming to all these fundamental understandings, why are you not doing all the things you said would be done the day you had time?
Day four of unemployment, I’m a little bit lost at the moment, I want to focus my thoughts, my energy, my drive, into all the things I should be, but, I’m also aware it’s the first time in, well, a long time I have no responsibilities outside of my family. This is what I wanted right? Time to do what I need to do, time to drag all that shit together I have lying around. Time to build that wall. Time to build my legacy, instead of helping maintains someone else’s.
Time is not our friend, and if we keep saying tomorrow, if we keep saying next week, next month, next year, then, we might as well never try, because we aren’t really trying, we’re just lying, to ourselves.