Sliding into something that’s not mine,
Breaking time to be,
Like a blister exploding,
Pain entangling everything that is me,
Capturing each nerve grander than the last,
Engulfing,
Exploding,
Rearranging my sense of self,
Swallowing who I thought I was inside the mouth of who the world sees me as,
Like a spider laying eggs inside its prey,
I pray,
I scream,
I explode,
I become a vacuum of what I was,
Drawing all I could ever be inside my emptiness,
Never to be,
For you to never see,
Me…
Like a supernova clawing at your ying,
The power of your heart comes from the words we sing,
As the moments fall down around our heels,
We break down the walls not on what it is but how it feels,
Scuba diving in the endless forever,
Making every moment last for ever and ever,
A brilliant flash of light,
A self guided fire burning bright,
And end and a beginning in the same moment,
A birthing of commitment in the waters of atonement,
For tomorrow’s horizons see what can be,
On the back of the beast they come to take me,
But no ones going to take me alive,
I will be the only one to survive,
Like a supernova clawing at your eyes,
I will be all that survives!
Waivering sins,
Undefeated guilt,
Digested hate,
Glorified wanting,
Pay attention to me,
Pay attention to this before you,
See the hand of time dispel the lies,
See my face before the world dies,
The last thing you’ll ever see,
I can’t believe what you were to me,
The glorified feeling of a want turned into a hate I at first refused to see,
But I digested all that was before me and took my guilt in steed,
Undefeated,
Unwavering,
My sin was mine,
And yours was me,
Step forward from where you hide,
Step out into the light,
Step into thy ring of punishment,
For it’s time to burn for my sins!
Smile you cunt,
Bet you never thought we’d be back here,
Staring into each other’s eyes once more,
But the games you played,
The lies you told,
The way made me feel,
It was the perfect storm,
The perfect story to be told,
You asked for my attention,
You begged for my affection,
You twisted my smile,
You fucked my life,
The undertow pulled me under,
Leaving me numb,
Lifeless,
Empty,
Like your eyes,
As they stare at me from beyond the grave,
This was how we were meant to end,
This was how I am supposed to mend the damage you’ve done,
This is a start,
Not the end!
Through these blind eyes I now see,
Cover me in thorns,
Bleed me dry,
Sacrifice never knowing,
Sacrifice the truth,
Let everything unwind as my kingdom falls down around my feet,
A disposed king without subjects leading to live again,
Learning what truly defines who I am,
Not who I was,
Was that ever me?
Or was that the me you wanted me to be?
Was that ever me?
Or was that the me you made me be?
I see the light,
This was not right,
The feelings revolved around us,
As they evolved what was us,
Leaving an empty shell of what we were,
Leaving a hell for me to survive in,
Desperately seeking relevance,
A place to hide,
Away from myself,
From the truth of what is,
From what I am,
I see the light,
I know tonight,
It ends….
A sentence formed without words,
Another sequence,
A sound that is not,
Processed wisdom that holds no value,
A lie lived,
A truth hidden deep,
Why see with eyes if they are closed,
Why use words when their meaning is misunderstood,
We crucified a child,
When the adult preformed the seed,
Painted across their faces like a disease,
It was never meant to be the end,
But it was also never the beginning…
Payment declined,
My desire withheld,
A symphony of inconvenience born,
Suffocating my self,
Denying a want,
Now it becomes a need,
My drug,
My emptiness,
Closure of daylight,
As night takes hold,
An hour of handfuls,
A moon with no sun,
No reflection,
No light,
No words,
No me…
Mirror my reflection,
Twist it into something more,
I am my own reflection,
The mirror is only a window,
I see,
You saw,
A cry for help was not acknowledged,
But then you changed your mind,
Suddenly you had a purpose,
Suddenly I was of use,
A part to play in your wicked game,
How was I to know,
I’m just my own reflection,
Sitting her looking out the window,
Waiting for your attention,
Look at me,
Look what you’ve done,
Look at me,
Look what you’ve done,
Was it fun?
Forsaken is the sun that shines on the entrails of what was,
Desire leads to an ending of hateful spite,
Lacklustre endings fueled by mechanical constructs,
We bridge a want,
We grow a need,
But in truth none of those mean a thing without perfection,
A word robbed from the book of job,
A lie,
Fiction,
Like the rest of what was written,
But for those who are damned anything is better than facing the truth that once you sin,
Whatever waits after this life,
The darkness of forever,
Will not be as empty as you would hope,
For outside the void,
In the coldness of the nothing,
It waits for you and your sin…
Trust the insignificance of me to guide your way,
Let the lines not blur,
Forget,
Sleep,
Suffocate yourself within the lines of paranoia,
While the schism grows,
Festering like a boil,
Infecting everything,
The pus of who your were is washed clean by the new you,
The better version,
The version with hollowed eyes,
Ready to spread your disease,
Ready to spread the schism to its next host…
My tomorrow never had you in it,
My yesterday was scarred from your inclusion,
Today I bury the blade of my life in your skull,
And I fell cleansed,
Bitterness was not bitter,
For it was just hate,
Not for you,
But for what you was,
What your represented,
Tomorrow will be a new day as long as you are buried in the yesterday of what was,
And not infecting the today that will be tomorrow…
Wrapped in the rags of a pathetic lie sits what once could’ve been the truth,
But time over time has ended the chance for whatever once was the truth is now more of a lie than the lie that coveted it,
Sickness from a disease that never existed,
A plague that had no know beginning,
Cleansing of the trash,
Rise of the rich,
The guilty prosper while the innocent lose hope,
Failure,
Foreboding tales of dread masked in the light of a truth,
Simpleton,
You gave the wisdom of life away and accepted the infinite possibilities of what could be as your grounding,
How sadness becomes,
Let the light shine over you and retell your life through the eyes of what is,
And not what you think is…
Save the sickness from within the emptiness of your darkness,
You wished for a cleansing,
But what you received was a death sentence,
A failure,
A fault,
What wisdom,
For the wings of tomorrow that promised hope only gave an ending,
Sacrifice what was wanted,
Revive the hand that was given,
Take back the gift,
Forgiving can only do so much,
Forgetting will do less,
But revenge,
Retribution,
A tortured soul can be reborn there…
Seven signs of the inevitable,
The first was her,
She began the downfall of man,
Her name was Samantha,
Her eyes were lakes of fire,
Her soul as dark as the dead sun,
And her heart empty,
It was as if she was born into the world an adult,
The world quickly became her throne,
Men and women quickly became her slaves,
No one could resist,
Except the beast himself,
But he had his own role to play,
And six more signs to wait for…
I’m sitting on the edge of forever,
Staring into what was before,
Trying to forget what is,
Knowing what I can never say,
All the sorries seems so irrelevant,
All the times we never talked,
All the moments wasted,
I wish I could say it to you one more time,
I wish we could have another moment,
I wish yesterday was today,
But yesterday seems like a lifetime ago,
Everything seems so empty,
Everything seems so cold,
I want to see your face,
Instead of this headstone,
I want to say hello,
Instead of goodbye….
I paint myself in a different shade,
I draw myself with a face others are too blind to see,
I lie to myself because I don’t know how to be me,
I suffocate myself because that is what I do,
I hate therefore I am hated,
I sin therefore I am surrounded by sinners,
Request my ending,
Decide my fate,
Destroy my self,
With negativity and hate,
Eyes sewn shut,
Tongue cut out,
Why won’t you just kill me!
Why can’t you let me die!
You said I was nothing,
You said it wasn’t free,
You said I was a liar,
You said it was me,
Schism rides upon itself,
Flames of dire need,
Schism rides upon itself,
I smile while you bleed,
Sink within,
Sink within,
Schism,
Sink within,
Sink within,
They said I was nothing,
They said it wasn’t free,
They said I was a liar,
They said it was me,
Schism rides its ugly steed,
All your lies come to be,
Schism rides its ugly steed,
Open your eyes and truly see me,
Sink within,
Sink within,
My schism,
Sink within,
Sink within,
…
Sink within,
My schism,
Sink,
Sink,
My schism,
Sink,
Sink,
My schism,
My schism,
My!
Flickering pictures before me eyes,
Images of a life gone by,
Memories wrapped in a spiders web,
Lies told inside my head,
Deceiver,
Manipulator,
My own destiny intertwined,
Lost in a vortex inside my mind,
Dancing effortlessly around the dance floor in my head,
While I scream in terror,
No music plays,
No dance takes place,
A lie again,
My mind,
My friend,
My apple,
My reflection,
Me…
No matter what,
For now I see,
My insanity you fostered into this world beckons me,
It calls the name only you called me,
it’s like you’re still playing with my life,
Bridging the gap between this world and the next,
A swing of my axe,
A beat of the drum,
A flick of a string,
Blood in my teeth,
Soaking,
No matter what,
For now I see,
Every word you ever did to me were lies,
You twisted this tale I called my fucking life,
And you’ll pay the price for your hypocrisy as my axe comes down!