50 Word Story Expanded Short Story

Day 361 – Bang Goes The Drum – 50 Word Story Expanded

If you want to know how this story started, you can read about it HERE.


“Ya come here lokin for magic girl, I ain’t got no magic here, I ain’t got much’o anything, what makes ya believe me have that kinda thing here?” The old woman’s says, looking through her one good eye, while the other sits unmoving, white.

“I’ve come a long way to see you, I know what you really Vamera, the time for lies is over, your past is coming to bite you on the proverbial behind, so, you can continue down this road, or you can realize an ally when you see one,” the girl says sternly, launching herself to her feet.

The old woman laughs, “Ya take me for a fool girl? I’m old, been living a long time, but me don’t have no reason ta lie, not ta ya anyway, I know of Vamera, I know what she did, but, I hate ta spoil ya grand performance, she long gone, years now, ya ask anyone girly, they all tell ya all the same, she dead,” the old woman says.

“You lie, I don’t care what you say, I know who you are, and if you keep playing this game, I’ll make you wish to be dead!”

“What ya gonna do girly? I’m old, death be a blessing ta someone like me, ya gonna’ave to do better than that if ya wanna be scaring me,” she says with a crooked, toothless smile.

“You don’t realize who I am do you?” The girl says promptly, folding her arms across her chest.

“Does it matter? Ya just be some girl who thinks she’s a woman, an better than little old me,” the old woman says, squinting her good eye.

“I’m madam Contessa, of the DeMicShires, generation upon generation has my family been holders of the key of Danquiench, and as of last week, I inherited that honor. As I told you, your past, is about to catch up with you, the spell you placed upon my family, and now upon me, will be no more,” she says raising an old, eighteenth century pistol, cocking the firing mechanism as she does, she smiles. “Recognize this witch?” She says as she pulls the trigger, blowing a hole in the old woman, sending her crashing across the room, and into a bloody heap into the floor.

“My family is now avenged,” she says, as the old woman suddenly leaps into the air, and crashes into her.

“Ya gonna die now child, ya gone and wrecked this here body, an now me be needing a new one!” She screams as she pulls a bone handled blade from her dress, driving it into Contessa’s stomach.

“W-W-What are you, you doing?” She stammers.

“What I did ta ya great-great grand nanny and hers before that girly, how’d ya think an old woman like me be surviving so long in dying skins? I knew who ya were as soon as ya walked through me door, fate me call it,” she says with a chuckle. “Been waiting for one of ya ta come, and now ain’t no letting go of ya girl, ya here ta stay now, been hunting ya for ta long, ta just let ya go,” the old woman says as she digs the knife into the girls forehead, and slowly begins slicing it across her face, the girl screams out in agony.

6 replies on “Day 361 – Bang Goes The Drum – 50 Word Story Expanded”

Thanks so much, it came together after some prodding, although the style is very similar to the original, I think it’s a different story. Though it’s the feel I had spinning inside my head when I wrote the original short. Thanks again 🙂

Liked by 1 person

Her tongue is what I think gives her more depth, I think you can hear her clearer because of it. When I did the first short I was dabbling in the language of characters and really wanted to play with it more. I’m glad this was revisited.

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