I’m nervously anticipating the weekend, it’s been almost 8 years since Clare left with the girls, 8 years of being lost in my own self pity, my own nightmare. I haven’t called, I can’t, if I lose my nerve before I’m even there I’ll never go, so I have to go in blind, and hope it all works out.
If you were to ask me what I hoped to achieve from the trip, I honestly couldn’t tell you an answer, I mean, I know it’s not going to be instant happy families, and the last 8 years will be forgotten, but maybe it could be a start towards something like that.
Anyway, I’ve packed and unpacked more times than I can count in the last 2 days, reshuffled everything more than once, played my own game of weakest link and dropped those chosen to the floor, sometimes to pick them back up again.
But the reason I’m writing today’s post has not so much to do with the packing and unpacking, than it has to do with another bizarre happening in this house.
14 times this morning I’ve found a copy of Fear In Fear Magazine issue 247 stuffed in my bag, and 14 times I’ve taken it out, throwing it out a window 3 time for it just to reappear back in my bad, 4 times I’ve locked it in a room, jammed it in a drawer once, burnt it 3 times, cut it up once and tore it in two twice, but, each time, it appears in my bag, whole and, for the most part, undamaged. I thought at first I was just losing my marbles, but I’m not, I swear.
I went down to Harvey Normans to look at digital cameras, I thought maybe if I set up a camera on the magazine I could see what happen. 4 hours I left it there, and for 4 hours nothing happened, but, once I turned the camera off, the magazine somehow ended back up in my bag. So I’ve left it in front of the camera again, this time, I’m just going to leave it running and see what happens, worst case scenario, it won’t happen again.
Has anyone out there had weird experiences like this, where something just keeps finding its way back no matter how many times you try to stop it?