I had a moment, not too long ago, it could’ve been hours, or minutes, days even for all I know, but it was a realization, as the truth dawned on me, and then, moments later, disappeared into the void as though it was a clouds passing by, and the image I saw in it, the shape, gone as quickly as it formed.
But I tasted the blood, I felt the pain, I, I think it was them, my family, their blood spilling, a blade in my hand, then, at my own face,, ripping, tearing, could it be true?
The doctors say its normal, the trauma I experienced was deep, not just of the flesh, but my mind, it fractured into pieces, and I started developing, I keep losing my train of thought, things happen, mysterious things, confusing me, trying to send me off the deep end, trying to bust open the gate that is locked inside, that it hides behind, something dark, memories, or maybe worse.
Then there’s Gareth and his drawings, he doesn’t realize he’s just as infected as I am, if he were to look in the mirror he would soon see his own reshaping’s, his decay, and rebirth as a darkling.
Doctors? Words, words that have no place here, words I did not write, there are no doctor’s, there is no normality, there is only now, there is only this, the shifting sands of what is, what was, what never could have been, and, what will be, although I can’t even trust this blog anymore, I write words and others appear, someone, is playing with my mind, it’s him, the deceiver, I know you’re listening, I know you’re awake, somewhere in there.
Time is ticking out, and its ticking out for you, Matthew.